I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
