I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
