Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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