i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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