The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Sacagawea was the original milf.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Randomize
