i don't like sucking hair
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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