I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
