we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
this will be a night to untag.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Randomize
