Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
