Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Randomize
