This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
