I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
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