from now on my penis is your penis
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
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