youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Your dad touched me again.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Randomize
