champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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