Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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