bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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