I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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