Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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