i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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