so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
