I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
You did what with his pubic hair?
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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