Bisexual people are plain selfish.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize