Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
whose parrot is this?
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
