How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Pooping to opera.
Randomize