Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
her vagine was all disorganized.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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