apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
i think i have two assholes
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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