So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Randomize
