Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
