quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Randomize
