Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
