I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I cannot find my penis.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I believe in your delicious
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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