Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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