There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
