Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
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