Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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