You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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