I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
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