Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
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