she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize