remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Who died my cat blue again?
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
