Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
