Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
