I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
