Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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