we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
My balls are so social today.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Randomize
