hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
