I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
