Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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