doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
