I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
