I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Randomize
